Voila! Moliere weighs in on the Braves move
by Dick Yarbrough
December 28, 2013 12:00 AM | 1181 views | 0 0 comments | 36 36 recommendations | email to a friend | print
Dick Yarbrough
Dick Yarbrough
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You are very lucky people. Not only do you get the benefit of my thoughtful diatribes a couple of times a week — adjectives at no extra costs — but now you have the wit and wisdom of none other than Jean-Baptiste Molière, perhaps France’s greatest playwright, on the editorial pages of the Marietta Daily Journal. Molière and Yarbrough in the same paper. How cool is that?

Normally, I make it a point to never look at warm-spit blogs or “reader comments” or whatever they call this new fad in journalism. I’m from the old school. I get taken to the woodshed by readers frequently and that is only fair.

Strong opinions begat strong reactions. I take my kudos and criticism seriously, but only if they are signed. I toss all snail mail unread if there is no return address on the envelope and I zip right past the blatherings that appear in the paper with clever pseudonyms and go straight to Hagar the Horrible.

Please write this down: You don’t sign your name and I don’t give a tinker’s damn about your opinion.

Fortunately, my eye did catch the comments of M. Molière, nee Poquelin, who had taken time from writing and performing his exquisite comedies to weigh in on the demeaning comments of a frustrated city of Atlanta official over the pending move of the Braves to Cobb County. He — the bureaucrat, not Molière — referred to us as Cobb “Crackers” and Smyrna “S---holes.”

Many people took umbrage at the bureaucrat’s remarks. I didn’t. Anybody who lives or works in Malfunction Junction has every right to be frustrated. You would be, too, if you were stuck in a place where the sewers don’t work and neither do a number of its citizens. Gosh, even the local daily newspaper packed up a few years back and left town for Dunwoody, which is further away from the city than where the Braves are proposing to play ball.

Of course, that hasn’t stopped the paper’s righteous indignation, including a recent editorial cartoon showing the Grinch in a sled, towing three black baseball players toward Cobb County. I assume the artist drew that one in mostly-white Dunwoody. I must remember to ask M. Molière.

Jean-Baptiste has his pantalons in a wad over the way we act in Cobb County. He thinks we are racists and that “a majority black city can’t conduct ‘regionalism’ with a bunch of suburban Republicans who race bait while denying that they are race baiting and then whine like babies when the city does turnabout as fair play and throws their little comments and tactics back at them.”

That is disappointing, coming from a guy who once said, “One ought to examine himself for a very long time before thinking of condemning others.” Maybe he was having a bad wig day.

Molière also said, “All the ills of mankind, all the tragic misfortunes that fill the history books, all the political blunders, all the failures of the great leaders have arisen merely from a lack of skill at dancing.” He is right as pluie on this one. If we could dance better, we wouldn’t be so mad at each other. See why I love this guy? He knows his stuff.

I am much too in awe of one of the greatest writers of the 17th or any other century, to dare criticize him. (Although I did think of his use of “Oh please” bordered on plagiarism since that is a line I have been known to use frequently when the Woman Who Shares My Name says that if I don’t eat broccoli my hair will fall out and my teeth will rot.)

However, I was somewhat affligéd when this great man demeaned the character of another great man, my favorite quote machine, Rep. Earl Ehrhart (R-Powder Springs). Says Molière, “So what if a low-level city employee returns fire by just saying openly when Ehrhart and many other Cobb leaders use euphemisms.”

Faire attention, M. Molière. I’m not sure you know who you are messing with. Obviously, you have spent too much time inhaling face paint to know you don’t want to mix it up with a guy who once called the Lieutenant Governor “Eddie Haskell” (the snarky kid from “Leave to Beaver”) and referred to a bunch of anti-chickens-in-the-yard lobbyists as “Gladys Kravitz,” who as we all know was a minor character on the old “Bewitched” series. Mr. Ehrhart will verbally rip your coeur out, monsieur, and feed it to you for dejuener.

There is also the fact you once said, “I might, by chance, write something just as shoddy; but then I wouldn’t show it to everybody.”

C’mon. I do it all the time, Jean-Baptiste. I am just glad that someone as great as you can, too.

You can reach Dick Yarbrough at yarb2400@bellsouth.net; at P.O. Box 725373, Atlanta, Georgia 31139; or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/dickyarb.
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