OK, so maybe it wasn’t Pulitzer Prize material. Maybe not even worthy of a Nobel Peace Prize, and that crowd in Oslo will hand one of those things out to the first liberal weenie that knocks on their door. But I had thought you might be interested in following the money trail of the candidates seeking to replace U.S. Rep. Phil Gingrey (R-Marietta) who is running for the U.S. Senate.
In addition to the reader claiming that my two favorite mules had dissed me, I also got a note from the executive assistant/appointment manager to Larry Mrozinski, of Woodstock, a retired U.S. Army colonel running for the 11th District seat, regarding my observation that if the colonel wanted to beat the current slate of Republican candidates, which includes a former member of Congress; the majority whip in the Georgia State House; an ex-state senator; the recent executive director of the Governor’s Office of Workforce Development and a guy from England who is in the computer business in Kennesaw, the colonel might want to get hustling on raising money as well as raising his profile. That got her goat.
The executive assistant/appointment manager said the colonel entered the race only three weeks ago just after the last reporting period to the Federal Election Commission which is the “obvious reason” there would be a zero balance reported. She said the colonel’s first report will come in October and that my column was a “mischaracterization” of his campaign’s fundraising capabilities and “a disservice to someone who served this country for almost three decades.”
Disservice? Gee whillikers! The colonel has gotten his name in my column twice in two weeks. Not even my favorite quote machine, Rep. Earl Ehrhart (R-Powder Springs) can make that claim.
But it was the comment about Jack and Jill that had me walking the floor. As you know, these two mules were unceremoniously kicked out of Cobb County a couple of years ago through no fault of their own because a plan to have school children watch them plow and see what life used to be like on the farm died like a water-starved geranium. Some claim county officials finally realized that kids would rather see virtual mules on a virtual farm battling space invaders on their video game consoles. So Jack and Jill were shipped off to Montana or Canada — I get those places mixed up — but we have stayed in touch.
When I got the reader’s note, I immediately contacted the mules to see if they had really complained to one of my loyal followers. Jill said she didn’t want to get in the middle of this but, no, she had not called. She told me that she doesn’t talk to anyone in the county except me, and occasionally Gov. Roy Barnes. The mules still hope against hope that the former governor will use his influence and get them a job on his Marietta farm one day. Of course, Jack is so soused on fermented oats he can barely see the phone, let alone dial it. That is disturbing. Jack just won’t let go of his traumatic experiences in Cobb.
Jill said that while she had indeed read the column on MDJ Online, she would never tell a stranger that she fell asleep reading it. She claims that the reader made a lucky guess. I wonder.
Jill asked about the upcoming Republican primary and who I thought might win. It was obvious that she was trying to act interested in case she had hurt my feelings. Rather petulantly, I told her that it was still too early to tell. Frankly, I don’t think she cares one way or the other.
The actions of the Cobb Commission have soured Jack and Jill on politics. I guess if I was enjoying the good life in Cobb County and suddenly found myself exiled to Montana or Canada or wherever, I would probably feel the same way.
So, after all the long hours and hard work I put into producing a well-researched, in-depth and exclusive analysis of the current status of fundraising among the Republican candidates in the 11th Congressional District, my reward is a barb from a reader, a rebuke from an executive assistant/appointment manager, a denial from a mule and probably very little chance for a Pulitzer Prize. Sometimes, I could just cry.
You can reach Dick Yarbrough at email@example.com or P.O. Box 725373, Atlanta, Georgia 31139